The New Culture War: Straws
I have not yet left the cesspool that Twitter has become. I find some fascination in spending a few minutes seeing what the other half is concerned about these days.
While the culture wars over drag performers and transgender folks continue, an outsider might be surprised to learn that the new culture war is around straws. Yes, straws.
I thought this was an odd and isolated incident when the topic came up in my feed a couple of weeks ago. But then this week, there was another stream of dozens of tweets about straws.
Apparently, if you are a business or a person who now uses paper straws, you are considered “woke.” There are plenty of folks out there now who will not patronize an establishment that uses paper straws. Their idea of patriotism is now a call for plastics and big oil all the way — despite what they are doing to our marine life, wildlife, and air quality.
They seem not to know or care that Marvin Stone patented the first straw in 1888 and it was (are you ready for this?) . . . made of paper. Plastic straws did not become widespread until after World War II, but I remember that as a small child at my grandfather’s general store during the late ’60s, we used those striped paper straws at the lunch counter. Grandpa was as conservative as they come!
Estimates vary, but the average estimate I’ve seen is that Americans use about 300 million straws per day. Per day! I think it’s safe to assume that nearly 100% of those are single-use and thrown away. And that is just in the United States. While paper straws aren’t a perfect solution, paper biodegrades in 2–6 weeks, whereas plastic takes up to 200 years.
Because straws are small, they tend to get caught up in our water systems and end up in the ocean. There, the plastic breaks down into smaller plastic pieces that are ingested by fish. Imagine what that’s doing to our marine life. Eventually, that plastic, one way or another, finds its way to our dinner table. So, I guess we are getting more than one use out of it!
The little but ubiquitous straw is now a flashpoint for right-wing rage. Commentator Nick Adams tweeted, “Paper straws have nothing to do with saving the turtles and everything to do with installing Karl Marx’s radical communist agenda.”
Another said, “I have a friend that used to be a liberal until he tried to drink from a paper straw he was given at a woke restaurant. Now he is supporting Trump 2024!” If you believe that tweet, nothing the Republicans or Trump did swayed this guy, but that straw was the last straw!
Another went so far as to say, “Paper straws make me wanna pollute the ocean.”
And then this: “Every time I use a paper straw I make sure to shoot a turtle at the pond.” Ah, don’t we love unfettered free speech?
So, you don’t like paper straws? There are other alternatives. You can carry around a reusable metal or bamboo straw. You can choose to sip from the cup. Or how about this? Instead of just handing us a straw at a fast food place, how about we have to ask for one? I bet that alone would cut down significantly on plastic straw use.
I’ve been told by someone in the know that these alternatives are not great for the handicapped community. For example, asking them to wash their own straws adds a burdensome chore that the rest of us don’t have to think about much. Plastic is easier. Okay, so how about we leave the plastic straws to the handicapped?
My larger point is this: Why does it have to be all or nothing? Why can’t we make compromises for the good of all and cut our plastic straw consumption by 50%? Furthermore, why are we politicizing environmental issues? Have we become so willfully blind that we refuse to see the documented visual evidence in photos and videos of our pollution of the planet and the harm that it does? Have we become so selfish that can’t sacrifice a simple straw for the good of all? If “woke” means being aware of the problems and having empathy for the plight of others, call me woke.
If we can’t get ourselves to simply give up the plastic straw for the sake of the planet, what are these “asleep” folks (opposite of woke) going to say when we tell them that their daily meat habit causes more greenhouse gases than the transportation industry?
I see the future and it doesn’t look good.
